“But when his heart was lifted up and his spirit was hardened so that he dealt proudly, he was brought down from his kingly throne, and his glory was taken from him. He was driven from among the children of mankind, and his mind was made like that of a beast, and his dwelling was with the wild donkeys, He was fed grass like an ox, and his body was wet with the dew of heaven, until he knew that the Most High God rules the kingdom of mankind and sets over it whom he will. Daniel 5:20-21
I was recently watching a commercial for the Wounded Warrior Project. The warrior they were highlighting had suffered a severe head injury. Mentally, he is no longer the man his wife married. He was expending tremendous effort to learn basic motor skills that a few years earlier had taken no thought.
However, the damage to this soldier’s brain has effected more than his ability to control his body. My heart broke for this family when his wife explained that she now considered her husband among the children she cares for. Her husband is no longer the decisive, independent, cheerful man that he once was. His brain injury took more than what he could do. It took who he had been.
This story stirred within me a hidden fear. I, like most people, do not relish the thought of a debilitating injury. However, I have less fear of injuries and diseases that affect the body but don’t damage the mind. While a person’s body may not function, they remain themselves as long as their mind functions.
I find the loss of my mind a fearful prospect. Prior to public speaking, I have gotten a twinge of fear about sudden onset of tourette syndrome; what if I drop an f-bomb in the middle of a sermon or started barking during a City Council meeting. When I can’t remember something common, I will go through a self-diagnosis for Alzheimer’s. Depression’s thief of emotional balance, freaks me out.
Brain injuries, mental illness, Alzheimer’s, all defile the sanctuary of the mind and change the personality of a person. I have difficulty separating my mind from my identity. If my mind becomes lost, does the only person I’ve ever known myself to be, cease to exist? Am I merely a unique network of synapses whose existence depends upon healthy tissue, proper chemistry, and the timely firing of neurons?
By my mind, I do all things.
By my mind, I know the world around me.
By my mind, I know my wife, children, and all whom I love.
By my mind, I read the scriptures and know my God.
By my mind, the world knows me.
We learn in Daniel that Nebuchadnezzar lost his mind. Today, he would have been institutionalized rather than being left to eat grass and live exposed. However, his reduction to beast was not due to random mental illness, an injury, or blood clot.
God took Nebuchadnezzar’s sanity.
I do not know the means by which he was deprived of his ability to reason but I know who its author was. All that Nebuchadnezzar was; his position, wealth, status, intelligence, and personality were in God’s hands. God took Nebuchadnezzar’s sanity from him so that he would “…know that the Most High rules the kingdom of men and gives it to whom he will.” (Daniel 4:25)
I don’t know all the why’s behind malfunctioning brains. I don’t know why age eventually strips everyone of clear thought. However, I do know that God is in control of all things, including the function of brains. I do know that God continued to know Nebuchadnezzar even when he did not know himself.
Therefore, I do not need to fear the loss of my mind.
God knows me. I am His. If my sanity leaves me, He has the power to keep me. He will continue to know me even if the person I was ceases to be recognizable. I am more than a network of synapses. There is a difference between soul and mind, even if I cannot perceive the difference. The failure of my mind does not erase my soul. No matter where suffering afflicts us, God keeps the souls of those who are His and brings them home.
God is great and greatly to be praised. All that we have, even our sanity, is a gift from him. All is His. The Most High rules the kingdom of men and gives it to whom He will. He is a good Father and knows what His children need. He will take care of His children when they cannot take care of themselves.
Therefore, He can be trusted with all that we are and all that we have, even our sanity.
PRAYER: Lord, I lift up all my brothers and sisters in Christ who are suffering through brain injuries and mental illnesses. I pray that you will make yourself known to their troubled minds. I pray that you will grant them a peace and understanding beyond the function of their mind. Father, thank you for my mind. Thank you for the gift of sanity. Thank you enabling me to know myself and more importantly to know you. Forgive me for my pride and fear. I praise You, my Lord and Savior. You truly are the most High God and all things are yours. I pray this in the precious name of your Son, Jesus Christ. Amen.
A DEVOTED LIFE 