I LOVE YOU…THERE I SAID IT – April 27

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16

 “I love you!”, my friend professed as I turned to leave.

Oh, man…why did he go there?

“I have a profound appreciation for you, also,” was the perfunctory reply I dared not utter since  “love”  hung in the air.

I struggled for an appropriate response as milliseconds turned toward awkwardness.

Why could I not respond with, “I love you too”?
Why does professing our love from a brother in Christ seem so weird?
Why couldn’t we  just hit each other on the shoulder and that be enough?

I mustered up a weak, “me too,” as I made for the door.

Few phrases cause me more social angst than a profession of brotherly love from a non-confidant. I might have been scarred by the Bud Light commercials from the mid-90’s (I Love You Man).

The problem arises from my cultural interpretation of the implied meaning of love.  Love as defined by Dictionary.com:

1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.
2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.
3. sexual passion or desire.
4. a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart.

I know intellectually what the Bible teaches regarding love.

The second is this: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.  (Mark 12:31)

These things I command you, so that you will love one another.  (John 15:17)

Love one another with brotherly affections.  (Romans 12:9)

Owe no one anything, except to love each other…  (Romans 13:8)

Let brotherly love continue. (Hebrews 13:1)

Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart… (1 Peter 1:12)

Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.  (1 Peter 4:8)

Greet one another with the kiss of love…  (1 Peter 5:14)

Whoever loves his brother abides in the light, and in him there is no cause for stumbling.  (1 John 2:10)

Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. (1 John 4:11)

If anyone says, “I love God”, and hates his brother, he is a liar, for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen.  (1 John 4:20)

Our culture has skewed the meaning of love to such an extent that I struggle with the emotional aspect of love. I can intellectually know that I should tell my brother in Christ that I love him but a mental checklist suppresses my feelings:

Do I have a profoundly tender, passionate affection for this other person?
…Nope.

Do I feel a warm personal attachment or deep affection for this person?
…Not really.

Do I feel a sexual passion or desire for this person?
…Definitely not.

The inevitable conclusion is that I don’t feel the profound emotional response of love for this person as I have come to know what those feelings should entail. This conclusion makes any reciprocal profession of love seem less than genuine (Rom. 12:9). How can I love them…I barely know them?  That makes it weird.  Weirdness goes off the scale in trying to tell a sister in Christ that she is loved by me.  And to just complicate it more, consider the implications of the command to love our enemies.

But I say to you who hear, Love our enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.  (Luke 6:27)

If you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who do good to you, what benefit is that to you? Fore even sinners do the same.  (Luke 6:32)

If they truly are our enemy, than all the inherent meanings of love are turned upon their head. Our love must be genuine. It must flow from a heart that truly feels love. Therefore, we need to change our definition of love.  C.S. Lewis has aided my personal definition transition. He defined love as:

Love is not affectionate feeling, but a steady wish for the loved person’s ultimate good as far as it can be obtained.
~Answers to Questions on Christianity,” God in the Dock .

When we remove the societal demand for emotional affection from the definition of love, we begin to gain a better understanding of how to practically live in genuine love for those who are acquaintances, distant neighbors, or an enemy.

When I love someone, wishing for that person’s ultimate good as far as it can be obtained, my actions become those defined by love (1 Cor. 13:4-7).

Love is patient and kind
…because that leads to their ultimate good.

Love does not envy or boast
…because that will not lead to their ultimate good.

Love is not arrogant or rude
…because that will detract from their ultimate good.

Love does not insist on its own way
…because that is the way to their ultimate good.

Love is not irritable or resentful
…because that will detract from their ultimate good.

Love does not rejoice at wrongdoing
…because that will not lead to their ultimate good.

Love rejoices with the truth
…because therein lies their ultimate good.

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things for the ultimate good of those we love.

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only Son,
that whoever believes in him should not perish
but have eternal life.
(John 3:16)

God loved us while we were yet enemies because He desired our ultimate good and He accomplished it.

I  genuinely want that for everyone. I genuinely wish that all would come to Christ. I genuinely wish that all my family, friends, acquaintances, and enemies would come to their ultimate good. I don’t want to do anything that would be a stumbling block to anyone’s salvation or sanctification.

Based on this more appropriate definition of love, I do love people even though I find it sort of weird to express it.  However, expressing our love for one another is important.

Therefore, I want to express to all those who are reading this blog:

I LOVE YOU!

PRAYER: Father, thank you for first loving me.  Thank you for desiring my ultimate good and working out everything to that end.  Thank you for enabling me to love others – even my enemies.  Help me to to desire their ultimate good.  Lord, I lift up my enemies to you in love – give them their ultimate good, which is to know you. Father, make me a loving person in all ways and at all times.  I pray this in the precious name of your Son, Jesus Christ. Amen

Just to clarify, I love you …in an unromantic, less than platonic,  non-sexual, slug you in the shoulder sort of brotherly love …
that genuinely and earnestly wishes  the ultimate good for you,  that Jesus Christ, will flow in and through your life.

I know … it just seemed a little weird.
(I am working on it.)

QUOTE (Martin Luther King Jr.) – Jan 15

“Now there is a final reason I think that Jesus says, “Love your enemies.” It is this: that love has within it a redemptive power. And there is a power there that eventually transforms individuals. Just keep being friendly to that person. Just keep loving them, and they can’t stand it too long. Oh, they react in many ways in the beginning. They react with guilt feelings, and sometimes they’ll hate you a little more at that transition period, but just keep loving them. And by the power of your love they will break down under the load. That’s love, you see. It is redemptive, and this is why Jesus says love. There’s something about love that builds up and is creative. There is something about hate that tears down and is destructive. So love your enemies.”
~ Martin Luther King Jr.

In honor of Martin Luther King Jr., a Pastor and leader of the Civil Rights Movement, who was born on this day in 1929.

RESOURCES:
Today in History – January 6 
Martin Luther King Jr. > Quotes

BUT I DON’T WANNA BE SLAPPED – Nov. 21th

“But I say to you who hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also, and from one who takes away your cloak do not withhold your tunic either.” Luke 6:27-29

My goal in writing these devotions is to honestly reflect my own daily Bible reading. Honestly, I am not feeling it this morning. I awoke in a rather sour mood. The reality of my bad attitude just adds a spice of irritation to my emotional cocktail.

I know the source of my discontent. My attitude is directly linked to the sour task scheduled for my day. I have to spend half of my day meeting with lawyer types preparing a defense for an anticipated lawsuit. My company, which means me since we are a small business S corp, is going to be sued and I don’t even know specifically why. It is bewildering and it just goes on and on. Yet, the damage to our reputation continues unabated. One look at my personal finances will tell the story of their impact. It feels very unjust when the law is used as a hammer and you the nail.

I prefer obedience when it is theoretical.  It is much easier to follow Christ when my enemies aren’t real; when they aren’t trying to take my money; when they aren’t striking me; when they aren’t abusing my reputation. The fact is that I really don’t want to offer up my other cheek. The only cheeks that I want to offer up are to be kissed and they’re not on my face. I think that we can all agree that I probably don’t have a “Christ-like” attitude at the moment.

I thought I had forgiven these people but I realize that I have more work to do. It is painfully evident that may sanctification is not complete. I need God to continue His work on my heart because I am not reflecting Him well. Jesus, in Luke 6:32, makes it very clear that there is no benefit in loving those who are nice to us. The statement is made when we show mercy and kindness to those people who have been jerks and worse to us. God’s mercy is on full display when we are willing to do good, bless, and pray for those who sue us. The fact is that God was kind to me when I was ungrateful and evil; He showed me mercy when I was his enemy. (Luke 6:35-36) What am I if I don’t do the same? It is not about my enemies. It is not about me. It is about the glory of God.

I am going to confess the sin of my disobedient attitude and I am going to love these people who are coming after me. Not because they deserve it but because of Christ and the mercy that he showed me. My prayer is that somehow, in my doing good, blessing and praying for my adversaries, God will be glorified.  That will be worth a few slaps up-side the head.

OK – I am much better now; bring on the lawyers.

PRAYER: Lord, Forgive me for my unloving attitude. Forgive me for acting just like every other sinner in this world. Forgive me for not reflecting your mercy and goodness.  Lord, you can may these struggles that I am facing go away. Please do that; take my adversaries away but if that is not your will then give me strength. Show me how to do good to them; show me how I can bless them.  Father, I pray for them. They need you more than anything else. Please draw them to yourself that they may become your children.   Amen