I LOVE YOU…THERE I SAID IT – April 27

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16

 “I love you!”, my friend professed as I turned to leave.

Oh, man…why did he go there?

“I have a profound appreciation for you, also,” was the perfunctory reply I dared not utter since  “love”  hung in the air.

I struggled for an appropriate response as milliseconds turned toward awkwardness.

Why could I not respond with, “I love you too”?
Why does professing our love from a brother in Christ seem so weird?
Why couldn’t we  just hit each other on the shoulder and that be enough?

I mustered up a weak, “me too,” as I made for the door.

Few phrases cause me more social angst than a profession of brotherly love from a non-confidant. I might have been scarred by the Bud Light commercials from the mid-90’s (I Love You Man).

The problem arises from my cultural interpretation of the implied meaning of love.  Love as defined by Dictionary.com:

1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.
2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.
3. sexual passion or desire.
4. a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart.

I know intellectually what the Bible teaches regarding love.

The second is this: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.  (Mark 12:31)

These things I command you, so that you will love one another.  (John 15:17)

Love one another with brotherly affections.  (Romans 12:9)

Owe no one anything, except to love each other…  (Romans 13:8)

Let brotherly love continue. (Hebrews 13:1)

Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart… (1 Peter 1:12)

Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.  (1 Peter 4:8)

Greet one another with the kiss of love…  (1 Peter 5:14)

Whoever loves his brother abides in the light, and in him there is no cause for stumbling.  (1 John 2:10)

Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. (1 John 4:11)

If anyone says, “I love God”, and hates his brother, he is a liar, for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen.  (1 John 4:20)

Our culture has skewed the meaning of love to such an extent that I struggle with the emotional aspect of love. I can intellectually know that I should tell my brother in Christ that I love him but a mental checklist suppresses my feelings:

Do I have a profoundly tender, passionate affection for this other person?
…Nope.

Do I feel a warm personal attachment or deep affection for this person?
…Not really.

Do I feel a sexual passion or desire for this person?
…Definitely not.

The inevitable conclusion is that I don’t feel the profound emotional response of love for this person as I have come to know what those feelings should entail. This conclusion makes any reciprocal profession of love seem less than genuine (Rom. 12:9). How can I love them…I barely know them?  That makes it weird.  Weirdness goes off the scale in trying to tell a sister in Christ that she is loved by me.  And to just complicate it more, consider the implications of the command to love our enemies.

But I say to you who hear, Love our enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.  (Luke 6:27)

If you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who do good to you, what benefit is that to you? Fore even sinners do the same.  (Luke 6:32)

If they truly are our enemy, than all the inherent meanings of love are turned upon their head. Our love must be genuine. It must flow from a heart that truly feels love. Therefore, we need to change our definition of love.  C.S. Lewis has aided my personal definition transition. He defined love as:

Love is not affectionate feeling, but a steady wish for the loved person’s ultimate good as far as it can be obtained.
~Answers to Questions on Christianity,” God in the Dock .

When we remove the societal demand for emotional affection from the definition of love, we begin to gain a better understanding of how to practically live in genuine love for those who are acquaintances, distant neighbors, or an enemy.

When I love someone, wishing for that person’s ultimate good as far as it can be obtained, my actions become those defined by love (1 Cor. 13:4-7).

Love is patient and kind
…because that leads to their ultimate good.

Love does not envy or boast
…because that will not lead to their ultimate good.

Love is not arrogant or rude
…because that will detract from their ultimate good.

Love does not insist on its own way
…because that is the way to their ultimate good.

Love is not irritable or resentful
…because that will detract from their ultimate good.

Love does not rejoice at wrongdoing
…because that will not lead to their ultimate good.

Love rejoices with the truth
…because therein lies their ultimate good.

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things for the ultimate good of those we love.

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only Son,
that whoever believes in him should not perish
but have eternal life.
(John 3:16)

God loved us while we were yet enemies because He desired our ultimate good and He accomplished it.

I  genuinely want that for everyone. I genuinely wish that all would come to Christ. I genuinely wish that all my family, friends, acquaintances, and enemies would come to their ultimate good. I don’t want to do anything that would be a stumbling block to anyone’s salvation or sanctification.

Based on this more appropriate definition of love, I do love people even though I find it sort of weird to express it.  However, expressing our love for one another is important.

Therefore, I want to express to all those who are reading this blog:

I LOVE YOU!

PRAYER: Father, thank you for first loving me.  Thank you for desiring my ultimate good and working out everything to that end.  Thank you for enabling me to love others – even my enemies.  Help me to to desire their ultimate good.  Lord, I lift up my enemies to you in love – give them their ultimate good, which is to know you. Father, make me a loving person in all ways and at all times.  I pray this in the precious name of your Son, Jesus Christ. Amen

Just to clarify, I love you …in an unromantic, less than platonic,  non-sexual, slug you in the shoulder sort of brotherly love …
that genuinely and earnestly wishes  the ultimate good for you,  that Jesus Christ, will flow in and through your life.

I know … it just seemed a little weird.
(I am working on it.)

DRAMA MONKEY – April 5

“At that time I said to you, ‘I am not able to bear you by myself. The Lord your God has multiplied you, and behold, you are today as numerous as the stars of heave. May the Lord, the God of your fathers, make you a thousand times as many as you are and bless you, as he has promised you! How can I bear by myself the weight and burden of you and your strife? Choose for your tribes wise, understanding, and experienced men, and I will appoint them as your heads.’” Deuteronomy 1:9-13

…but what if it is your Circus?
…And what if they are your monkeys?

 I finished reading through the book of Numbers in my daily Bible reading plan. I would very much like to have seen the Israelites traveling through the wilderness. I would have liked to have stood beside Balaam at the top of a peak to see what a fraction of God’s people looked like.  However, I read the chronicles of the grumbling and intrigue of that people and wonder at what a circus it was. The faithful provisions of God, sustaining His people, delivering His people, guiding His people, did not stop all of the sinful drama.

Yet, I know that the drama of the Israelites in the wilderness is matched by the drama of the Nation of Israel in the Promised Land, which was matched by the drama of the Pharisees and Sadducees. It was all a circus.

I also know that the redemption of God’s people by the saving work of Jesus Christ did not cure us from this circus of sinful drama. There was drama amongst the disciples; drama in the 1^st Century church; drama in the Church of the Middle Ages; drama through the reformation; and drama to this day.

I was speaking with a co-worker who was explaining the chaos of a church split where he had previous attended – it was a circus.

If you have ever been a part of the leadership in a well-establish community Church – it is a circus of meeting needs and quelling the disgruntled.

If you have ever been a part of a Church plant – CIRCUS.

The functioning of God’s people has always been a circus. The Church is a circus because it is filled with monkeys. The Church breeds drama because we all are drama monkeys in one degree or another. No one is sin free. We are all progressing in our sanctification. Therefore, we all bring our sanctified selves and our drama monkey selves to whatever we do.  You don’t have to look hard to see the effects of Church monkeys.

The Donkey Kongs (Donkey Kong)
The Church monkeys who continually
puts obstacles and barricades in the way of others.

The Georges (Curious George)
The innocent and naïve Church monkeys who do not listen
to anyone and continually get themselves into trouble and danger.

The King Louies (Jungle Book)
The Church monkeys who live amongst blessings, but crave something
different and manipulate others through their discontentment.

The Clydes (Every Which Way but Loose)
The Church monkeys who are just ornery and
have a bad habit of hurting people.

The Caesars (Rise of the Planet of the Apes – 2011)
The Church monkeys who covet position and prestige
through the instigation of rebellion and discord.

The Rafikis (The Lion King)
The Church monkeys who appear wise
but no one really understands anything they are saying.

The Church is filled with a variety of drama monkeys. I don’t want to be a drama monkey but I know that I am. I hope that I am less monkey than I used to be but I know there is still a drama monkey within me. Thankfully, God’s work in my life is not done. Yet, I am always disappointed when my drama monkey escapes to play in the sinful circus of relational drama. I am disappointed when that happens because I know that I have just played a role in making the Church the circus that it should not be. I hate that.

I long for the day when the Church will be drama free but I don’t expect to see it until Christ returns. I lament the fact that those outside the Church recognize the hypocritical nature of our chaos and strife ridden circus.  However, everything that sinful man touches turns into a circus – government, councils, civic clubs, unions, commissions, work groups, boards, sports teams, associates, …everything has the relational drama of a circus.  Every organization composed of people will be fraught with drama because we are drama monkeys.

We should not be surprised by the fact that our churches have drama. They contain people who are still progressing in their sanctification. Therefore, circuses are bound to occasionally break out due to unrestrained drama monkeys. Yet, I love the Church because it is the only place on Earth where the circus is being removed. It is not perfect and it is not complete but it is where God’s people come together and wherever God’s people come together, the Spirit is at work.  And wherever the Spirit is at work, God is sanctifying us from our drama monkeys.

That makes the Church the Greatest Circus on Earth. 

That makes it my Circus.
And all those drama monkeys, are my monkeys.
And I am theirs.  

PRAYER: Father, forgive me for making a circus out of your Church here on earth.  Forgive me for all of my monkey drama ways.  Continue your work in me.  Continue your work in your Church.  May you be glorified in our imperfect works and flawed attempts to live with one another.  Lord, may your Spirit abound amongst us.  Help us to look past the monkey drama of our brothers and sisters and love them as you do.   I pray this in the precious name of your Son, Jesus Christ. Amen

 

 

I SEE NAIL PEOPLE – Mar. 27

“Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye?  Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye.  You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.” Matthew 7:3

 

It’s Not About the Nail (This post will make more sense if you watch this video first)

I see nail people walking around like regular people. They go through life seeing only what they want to see. They don’t know that they have a nail sticking out of their forehead. (I See Dead People)

I am a nail fixer.

I want to pull these nails that plague nail people’s lives.
I see the logical consequences of nails.
I am saddened by the blindness to their nail.
I don’t like to talk about nails.
I find little benefit in dwelling upon nails.
I just want to pull nails and be done with it.
I am frustrated by damage that never needed to have happened.
I mourn the inevitable results of nail blindness.

I am a nail fixer.

Yet, those who I try to fix are often scratched and scared by my efforts.
Often, my frustration only makes the original snag worse.
Frequently, the force of my pull on the nail acts more like a hammer.
The fruit of my nail fixing can logically mean only one thing…

I am a nail person.

My nail is the nail of  “I”.
We all have nails that we are blind to; a blindness that God often allows.
A nail of  “I”  supplants the sovereignty, grace and mercy of God.
None of us have been called to indiscriminately pull nails in our blindness.

We have been called to love our brothers and sisters as ourselves.

In that love, the personal nail of  “I” is bereft.
In that love, we may be called to help pull a nail.
In that love, we may be called to hold a hand through obvious consequence.
In that love, we may be called to pray in silence.

In that love, we are always called to glorify God.
In that love, we are always called to trust in God’s sovereignty.

In that love, we allow our personal nail of  “I” to fade into the great “I AM”.

PRAYER: Father, you know that I am a blind fool.  You know the log of “I” that has blinded me for so long. Lord, remove the log from my own eye.  Help me to love others as myself.  Enable me to love without the plague of my nail.  I want you to be glorified in all that I do.  Forgive me of the times that I have only made things worse.  I want to see beyond myself.  Teach me how to focus on you and thereby love the ones you have called me to love.  I pray this in the precious name of your Son, Jesus Christ. Amen

STRAVA-LIKE COMMUNITY – Mar. 24

“And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.” Hebrews 10:24-25

I have entered the world of Strava.   Strava is an app that tracks your running and cycling activity. It maps your route and calculates your average speed / pace and elevation gain.  You can post those results to Strava and compare your activity to other athletes.

Strava (Photo credit: Patrick’s Velolog)

Upon joining this community, I have discovered that I am slower than I had thought.  I have reviewed the top performers, the segment kings, of my cycling routes and marvel at some of the times posted.  There are individuals out there performing at a whole other level than I am.

I ride these routes in my little individual world and feel really good about my fitness.  My imagination conjures up fantasies of crossing finish lines and standing on podiums as I pedal away in solitude.  It is easy to become over-confident in one’s abilities when you only perform in solitude.

My confidence was rattled a bit  this weekend.  I am planning, Lord willing, to compete in the Tour of Ontario cycling race next weekend.  This weekend they had a pre-ride to allow local competitors to get familiar with the course.  I tried to hang onto the lead group but got dropped on a corner about two miles into the road race course.  I slowed a little too much through the corner and then did not have the legs to close the gap as the group accelerated away.  Once a gap formed, the slight head wind made it impossible for me to catch them.

I hate getting dropped.  I had an equal earnestness of wanting to catch the lead group and not wanting to be caught by the chase group.  So, I tried to stay as aerodynamic as one rider can be and pedaled on.  I ended up making the rest of the ride solo since I stayed in no-man’s land between the two groups.

When I finally finished the ride, I stopped the Strava app and was immediately prompted as to whether I wanted to record or discard the ride.  I was tempted to hit discard due to my lackluster performance.  I think of myself as a 20 mph average rider (I rarely hit that number so I don’t know why I have that expectation) but I had only averaged only 17.4 mph over the 32 mile route and had been dropped on top of that.

However, I sucked up my pride and hit record.

Later that day, I noticed several others from the pre-ride had posted their rides on Strava.  They were from the lead group that I could not catch.  I was surprised by the fact that none of them had average speeds over 20 mph.  They had smoked me, but not by the degree I had thought.  They had ridden in a group and I had gone solo.  Maybe, I had not done as bad as I had thought.

I could never have put my ride into perspective if I had not been willing to suck it up and actually be part of a community.  Being part of a community means that sometimes we will be embarrassed by our performance, but it also means that we can put our performance into perspective and be encouraged to push farther than we thought possible.  It means that we are challenged by those who are stronger and we can encourage those who are weaker.

I know many folks live their Christian lives like a solo ride.  They enjoy their spiritual experience but they don’t really share their personal relationship with God with their fellow brothers and sisters in Christ.  They keep their spiritual lives very private.

The problem with going solo is that we can convince ourselves that we are doing much better than we actually are.  We can become over-confident and unchallenged to go deeper in our faith and we can never stir up our brothers and sisters in Christ to love and good works.

True Christian community means that we meet together and are transparent with those we can trust about all of our activity – the good and the bad – the embarrassing and the triumphant.  It means that we are challenged by those who are following Christ to pursue greater love and good works and we encourage others to continue.

I know that there are times when we find ourselves in a spiritual no-man’s land and our path lead us through very solo stretches.  I am currently on one of those stretches.  However, that does not mean we accept the solitary Christian life as the norm; the norm should be community.  We should not neglect meeting together in real, honest community.  We should earnestly desire to be a part of real Christian community and not to be caught by the lackluster activities of former times.

We should appreciate it when we’re in it and seek it when we aren’t – you just might find it in very unexpected places.

PRAYER: Father, thank you for giving us community. Forgive me for having taken it for granted.  Forgive me for not seeking it like I should.  Lord, give me an earnestness to be a part of a Christian community that I don’t really feel at this time.  I know that it is important.  Sustain me through this period of solitude.  Father, give me a community where I will be challenged and encouraged and where I can do the same for others.  I pray this in the precious name of your Son, Jesus Christ. Amen

Related articles

• Accountability and Running: Being Better Than One’s Self
• Striving for fitness
• This is the Modem World: The connected cyclist’s dilemma
• I want a map of my rides – how do I do that?
• Strava Running and Cycling App Gets Redesigned With New Activity Feed, Live Updates, More
• Track Your Runs And Rides With The New Strava Running And Cycling App